Fun_People Archive
24 Aug
WhiteBoardness 8/23/95

Date: Thu, 24 Aug 95 11:42:24 -0700
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: WhiteBoardness 8/23/95

Excerpted-from: WhiteBoard News for August 23, 1995

London, England:

Freddie Mercury is dead, but his teeth gnash on -- in the gums of a

Using plaster casts of the legendary Queen frontsman's protruding incisors,
a London dentists has created an exact replica for professional impersonator
Patrick Myers, who'll flash his new choppers as lead singer for Closet Queen.

"I've already got the moustache, the extra-short microphone stand and the
sweat bands," Myers says, "but there was still something missing -- and it
wasn't just the hose pipe down my trousers."

Myers' new facial feature causes a few problems.  "There can be a danger of
drooling," he says, "but so far I haven't needed a bib."

Los Angeles, California:

Want to own a piece of a star?  Marilyn Monroe?  George Washington?  JFK?

Soon you can wear their DNA on your lapel.

StarGene, a company founded by Kary Mullis (expert witness in the O.J.
Simpson trial) and partner Ron Cook, will market products called

Using authenticated celebrity hair, they capture and reproduce the celeb
DNA and encapsulate it in a patented "GeneStone," which can be put in a
jewelry setting.

"This is actually the essence of the person.  There's nothing more intimate
than that," says StarGene spokeswoman Michelle Kelly.

The first group -- including Abe Lincoln -- goes on sale in January.

Fast News Forum:

Romanian police found a couple making love in a
Bucharest park and fined them the equivalent of $25 for
damaging the grass, which carries steeper fines than
indecent exposure.

Judy Guidry, 48, of Houma, Louisiana, a disabled nurse
out of work for more than a year, was turned down for
food stamps just hours before she learned she had won
$100,000 in the Powerball lottery.

[=] © 1995 Peter Langston []