Fun_People Archive
7 Sep
A Serious Deal?

Date: Thu, 7 Sep 95 13:45:05 -0700
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: A Serious Deal?

Forwarded-by: Mary Fleischman <>
Forwarded-by: Dave Fleischman <>
From: Brian F. Walker <>

        Ah, with mere seconds until the Official Debut of Windows '95
(motto: "We've taken an operating system that already hates the user, and
made it too slow and bulky to use on your system") I began to think of
my experiences with earlier versions of this product.

        Although I am far from computer illiterate, I note that most
every attempt by me to get Windows to do something, such as leave icons
WHERE I WANT THEM, or simple creation or deletion of directories, leaves
me screaming with rage at the computer and either cutting out to DOS or
taking the disk (if it's a 3.5 disk I was working on) to my Macintosh
and fixing things there. My attempts to keep more than one program open
at a single time always leave me promising not to use Windows ever, ever

        While I very rarely attempt to install software, people I know
who do always seem to end up with horror stories like, "We were putting
F117A Stealth Fighter into the games directory, but Windows told us we
were going to have to modify the CONFIG.SYS file by recognifuring the
device mods and adding a pinch of paprika, inserting into oven and
removing when touching a finger to it causes a mild blister, but then
we ended up having to copy our backup WIN.INI files in because it began
having failures with the system demanding 'Who Wants To Know?' every
time we tried to find the new files and then when we got the color maps
down correctly gremlins came out of the hard drive and took away little
Timmy, which is OK because we were tired of having to go to McDonald's
every week to get more 'Power Rangers' giveaway junk, but we're living
in fear now because we wantto put in the SimCity 2000 Urban Renewal Kit
and we're afraid Windows may steal the cat."

        My question, then, at long last, is: How the krunk did this thing
*ever* sell to anyone who was not an actual member of Bill Gates' immediate
family? Are we talking serious deal with the devil or what?

[=] © 1995 Peter Langston []