Fun_People Archive
8 Dec
Carmen - in Italglish

Date: Fri, 8 Dec 95 19:27:06 -0800
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: Carmen - in Italglish

Forwarded-by: (Keith Bostic)
Forwarded-by: "G.O.G." <>

 For opera lovers and haters alike, we reprint herewith the "English"
synopsis of the opera Carmen, as it appeared in the program for a recent
performance in Genoa, Italy.  Doubters should leave the auditorium: we have
seen it with our own eyes.

  "Act 1. Carmen is a cigarmakeress from a tobago factory who loves with Don
Jose (Duet: 'Talk me of my mother"). There is a noise inside the tobago
factory and the revolting cigar-makeresses burst into the stage. Carmen is
arrested and Don Jose is ordered to mounting guard her but Carmen subduces
him and lets her escape.

  "Act 2. The Tavern. Carmen, Frasquito, Mercedes, Zuiniga, Morales. Carmen's
aria ('The sistrums are tinkling'). Enter Escamillio, a balls-fighter. Enter
two smuglers (Duet: 'We have in mind a business') but Carmen refuses to
penetrate because Don Jose has liberated her from prison. He just now arrives
(Aria: 'Slop, here who comes') but here are the bugles singing his retreat.
Don Jose will leave and draws his sword. Called by Carmen's shrieks the two
smuglers interfere with her but Don Jose is bound to dessert, he will follow
into them (final chorus: "Opening sky wandering life').

  "Act 3. A rocky landscape, the smugler's shelter. Carmen sees her death in
cards and Don Jose makes a date with Carmen for the next balls fight.

  "Act 4. A place in Seville. Procession of balls-fighters, the roaring of
the balls is heared in the arena. Escamillio enters (Aria and chorus:
'Toreador, toreador, All hail the balls of a Toreador'). Enter Don Jose
(Aria: 'I do not threaten, I besooch you') but Carmen repels him wants to
join with Escamillio now chaired by the crowd. Don Jose stabbs her (Aria:
'Oh rupture, rupture, you may arrest me. I did kill her') he sings 'Oh my
beautiful Carmen, my subductive Carmen."

[=] © 1995 Peter Langston []