Mime-Version: 1.0 (NeXT Mail 3.3 v118.2)
From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Thu, 11 Sep 97 19:51:21 -0700
Subject: Hey Who?
From: firstname.lastname@example.org (Guy C Read)
Re: Hey Masturbata
Since turnabout is fair play, I figured we needed a distaff version of a
You know the tune.
Sittin' on the porch swing sort of rockin' all alona
There's a tingle 'tween my thigh bones on accounta my hormon-a
Lookin' for a green banana or a chunk of ring bologna
Just a little dab of KY or a squirt of Astro-Glide-a
Wipe my fingers on a Kleenex then go on and open wide-a
Back is humpin', heart's a pumpin', for the third time Aye-ay-aya.
Been a doer with a dildo since I found the old G-spot-a
Used a candle or the handle of a plunger or fly-swatta
Now my real life can't compare with all the fantasies I got-a
Robert Redford, Elvis Presley, Bruce Springsteen or Jake Lamotta
Any man I want I get - I close my eyes and fill my twat-a
They never snore or gripe 'bout sleepin' on the big wet spot-a,
Men are shits and men are pigs and never write and never call ya
But a cucumber's dependable and never splashes on the wall-a
And you never have to fake it with a piece of fresh Kielbasa
© 1997 Peter Langston