Words You Sort-of Already Knew
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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Thu, 26 Mar 98 14:53:45 -0800
Subject: Words You Sort-of Already Knew
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A large-sized, constrictive prophylactic.
arachnoleptic fit, n:
The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.
Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at 3 in
the morning and cannot be cast out.
The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas
penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of
breaking down in the near future.
The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially
impotent for an indefinite period.
The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're
The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things
that are good for you.
dopelar effect, n:
The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when you come at them
An eating place where you feel you've been abducted and experimented
on. Also known as ETry.
How wildlife ends up when its environment is destroyed. Hence
faunacatering, noun, which has made a meal of many species.
Any misrepresentation or outright lie about yourself that leads to
The cold, isolated place where arts companies without funding dwell.
The bloody state of the world.
Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it
was your money to start with.
A painful inability to move relatives who come to visit.
An idea that keeps floating into your head and prevents you from
drifting off to sleep.
© 1998 Peter Langston