Fun_People Archive
16 Dec
The Comedian's-eye View of 12/16/98

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Wed, 16 Dec 98 09:58:20 -0800
To: Fun_People
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Subject: The Comedian's-eye View of 12/16/98

X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649
Excerpted-from: 12/16/98 -- ShopTalk

                      Wednesday December 15, 1998

       "My portfolio's pretty much tied up in food and shelter."

                        -- Natalie (Sabrina Lloyd), explaining what
                           she does with her income, on 'Sports Night'


"Kelsey Grammer has directed and starred in some X-rated videos. It'll be
part of NBC's 'Must Gag Me TV!'" (Zack Taylor - Westwood One Radio Network)

An impeachment showdown takes place Thursday.  Members of the House are
being asked to vote their conscience.  They will spend the next few days
trying to find one. (Alan Ray)

Prominent Republicans say they are confident their impeachment of President
Clinton will not hurt them in the 2000 elections. They say voters will
quickly forget the attack against Clinton....In a related story, leaders of
the Donner Party were reported to have said: "Don't be wussies, no one will
know! Besides, we'll just eat the non-essential parts." (Bill Williams)

"What is it suddenly about sex and Republicans?   Bob Dole announced he's
the new spokesman for Viagra.  Michael Huffington announced he's gay. And
today, Bill Clinton announced he's switching parties." (Voldseth)

"The American Psychiatric Association has voted to ban therapy aimed at
turning homosexuals into heterosexuals.  They say it is unproven and a waste
of money, and besides, that's the job of TV audiences." (Voldseth)

"Support for the impeachment of Bill Clinton grows.  Calls for leniency by
Democrats are being ignored by the GOP.  In fact, Republicans are treating
them as if they were the American people." (Alan Ray)

"The 9th Star Trek film is number one at the box office.  How do you keep
a Trekkie from talking during the movie?  Sit him next to a beautiful
woman." (Ray)

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