Fun_People Archive
3 Feb
The Comedian's-eye View of 02/03/99

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Wed,  3 Feb 99 14:10:08 -0800
To: Fun_People
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Subject: The Comedian's-eye View of 02/03/99

X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649
Excerpted-from: 02/03/99 -- ShopTalk

                      Wednesday February 3, 1999

             "The vote sends a strong, clear message to
              the American people...The Senate Hates you!

   Jon Stewart on Senate Vote on Impeachment Dismissal & Witnesses


Dan Quayle is running for president. "You think Quayle is qualified to be
our next president? I mean, here's a guy who thinks that Y2K is a character
from the new 'Star Wars' movie." (Andrew Wisot)

Missouri's governor commuted the sentence of a prisoner on Death Row to life
in prison after Pope John Paul II pleaded for mercy.  "Now if we could get
the Pope to work on the House Republican Managers." (Joshue Sostrin)

Jay Leno will be doing a column for Popular Mechanics magazine.  "Meanwhile,
Mr. Goodwrench will be headlining at the Improv." (Daily Scoop)

February in Latin means "to purify."  In fact, Romans used to purify
themselves every February by gathering in the street, getting drunk, and
fighting with the soldiers.  Or as they call it in Denver, a (Superbowl)
victory parade. (Steve Voldseth)

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