Things You Would Never Hear Your Jewish Mother Say
Mime-Version: 1.0 (NeXT Mail 3.3 v118.2)
From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Wed, 21 Apr 99 03:58:02 -0700
Subject: Things You Would Never Hear Your Jewish Mother Say
Forwarded-by: Bob Stein <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Things You Never Would Hear Your Jewish Mother Say:
"Be good and on Hanukah I'll get You a BB gun!"
"How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back."
"Don't bother wearing a jacket - the wind-chill is bound to improve."
"Let me smell that shirt - yeah, it's good for another week."
"I think a cluttered bedroom is a sign of creativity."
"Yeah, I used to skip school, too."
"Just leave all the lights on...it makes the house more cheery."
"Could you turn the music up louder, so I can enjoy it, too?"
"Run and bring me the scissors! Hurry!"
"Aw, just turn these undies inside out. No one will ever know."
"I don't have a tissue with me - just use your sleeve."
"The curfew is a general time to shoot for. It's not like I'm watching the
clock or anything."
"Well if Timmy's mom says it's okay, that's good enough for me."
"Sorry. I only have white bread for that baloney sandwich."
© 1999 Peter Langston