Fun_People Archive
15 Jun
The Comedian's-eye View of 06/15/99

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Tue, 15 Jun 99 13:19:51 -0700
To: Fun_People
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Subject: The Comedian's-eye View of 06/15/99
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X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649
Excerpted-from: 06/15/99 -- ShopTalk

                         Tuesday June 15, 1999

      "The world got along without John F. Kennedy and Jesus
            Christ...we'll get along without Lou Dobbs."

                 Ted Turner, at NCTA as quoted in
                     Electronic Media Daily Fax


The peace plan in Kosovo has taken effect. "I just hope it's as effective
as the one we've got in the Middle East." (Jay Leno)

In an interview, Will Smith said that, if he wanted to, he could be elected
President of the United States. "In a related story, Al Gore said that, if
he wanted to, he could get jiggy with it." (Conan O'Brien)

"Andre Agassi got a grand slam. When Dan Quayle heard, he asked 'Was that
with or without the bacon?'"  (Zack Taylor - Westwood One Radio Network)

According to a study, alcohol can raise the estrogen level in your body.
"You know what this means? Budweiser is now the queen of beers." (Andrew

Oliver Stone was arrested for DUI and possession of hash.  Police won't say
exactly how fast he was going.  But knowing him, he was most likely in the
60's. (Alan Ray)

Serb troops are going home.  Slobodan Milosevic's wife has written a book
about her dream for Kosovo.  It takes a pillage. (Ray)

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