Fun_People Archive
20 Aug
NTK bits, 1999-08-20

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Fri, 20 Aug 99 09:38:44 -0700
To: Fun_People
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Subject: NTK bits, 1999-08-20

X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649
Excerpted-from: NTKnow Fri, 20 Aug 1999 16:23:03 +0100

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         "An *operational* Dalek from the television programme Dr Who
           fetched UKP6,670 yesterday at an auction of memorabilia..."
         - "News In Brief", 1999-08-19, DAILY TELEGRAPH (our emphasis)
...SOLD! to the squawking, grey-faced man on the knobbly silver podium...

                                >> HARD NEWS <<
                                 demons loosed

	We didn't make it to last week's SECONDARY DNS (it's okay, we've
	got last year's cached somewhere). But why bother, when the ongoing
	trend of Hackers Do Press Packs is still alive and kicking? In the
	traditional cannily-worded, yet alternatively-spelt press release,
	the kids revealed to the Proper Media that both the Royal Mail and
	the Scottish Executive sites are running exploitable versions of
	Microsoft IIS. "These weaknesses will eventually be exploited", they
	say, slowly so that everyone can understand, "by criminals,
	terrorists and other enemies of the UK". Or a bunch of script
	kiddies, depending on who reads the conference notes first. The Royal
	Mail responded quickly with a statement that security patches were
	put in place "in the last year" (in other words: the day after DNS
	e-mailed them with the details). And the Scottish Executive? Oh,
	we're sure they'll get around to it sooner or later. A few minutes
	too later, if past experience is anything to go by.
                                         - white "kiss me quick" hats
                          - naked girls, naked guys, naked SERVERS...

	It's always nice when someone decides to join the Anarchist Internet
	Conspiracy. Imagine, then, the interest at the UK's Earth First!
	Action Update when Jo, a "committed environmental and anti-
	corporation activist", e-mailed to ask how she could get involved
	in future campaigns like J18, which she "really enjoyed".
	Particularly intriguing was the Hotmail address that "Jo" sent her
	request from: "Jonathan Ungoed-Thomas" <>. Could
	Jo be somehow related to JONATHAN UNGOED-THOMAS of the Sunday Times,
	whose recent work has included a searing expose on how "J18
	activists" have become "cyber-terrorists", "trained in hacking
	techniques to attack the computer networks of banks and financial
	institutions"? Amazing that a journalist so well-versed in infowar
	didn't realise that creating a fake hotmail account involves putting
	a false name in the sign-up form. Still, he is learning. Previous
	Ungoed-Thomas pleas have come from "Laura", who contacted eco-
	advocate George Monbiot offering her assistance as a "committed
	anti-corporatist". That time, the canny Laura e-mailed her kind
	offer directly from Jon's Sunday Times work e-mail: Jonathan - get out of the
	building! Those cyber-terrorists are IN THE ROOM WITH YOU!,4273,3893320,00.html
                        - more biting-the-hand-that-feeds-us coverage
     - sneaky double agent "Laura" poses as journo from Sunday Times!

                               >> EVENT QUEUE <<
                         goto's considered non-harmful

	Now in its third year (as we are), and we're getting a bit bored of
	plugging THE MIND SPORTS OLYMPIAD, next week from tomorrow
	1999-08-21 at (appropriately enough) Olympia Conference Centre,
	London. With a few exceptions - "Creative Thinking", "Mental
	Calculations" (but no sign of 1997's "Computer Programming" contest)
	- it's just a load of silly board games: Backgammon, Bridge, Chess,
	Countdown, Scrabble, and "Skat" (assuming that's not the art of
	irritating jazz rapping). Why no genuine real-life skills, like
	Quake or pub quiz...
      - or a "Scanners" stare-out to make each other's heads explode?

	Probably more brain-stretching at the first ever UK SKEPTICS'
	PICNIC, this Sun 1999-08-22 at Clarence Gate, Regents Park, London
	(near Baker St Tube). "Bring your own food, drink and homemade UFO,"
	they advise. "A prize will be offered for the UFO that flies the
	furthest." According to the site, chief unbeliever Wendy Grossman
	recently appeared on "This Morning" unsealing a "cursed box" claimed
	to bring death to all who open it...
                 - hope she doesn't mix it up with all the hampers...

                                >> MEMEPOOL <<
                              hasta la altavista

	BRION "LEON" JAMES' incept date kicked in last week... YES!  YES!
	GOD! YES! ...  SNUFF IRC: ... Nazis bombed a lot of cemeteries
	- to prevent allies creating ZOMBIE ARMY? ...  memo
	to Jerry Hall: you know PAUL ALLEN likes his "slashes" the "wrong
	way around", don't you?... SKOOLDAZE '99 out for summer: it's playing
	"Yankee Doodle" on the TRS-80 all over again: ... retro-emulate THIS: ... Kevin Smith's Christian- baiting
	DOGMA due for UK release on Boxing Day... Calista Flockhart and
	Diablo skellingtons? As sick as ZDNET gets:
	... ROSS ANDERSON researches back-up sources of funding: ... THE
	... and which frickin' website was DR EVIL referring to: or or what?...

                               >> GEEK MEDIA <<
                  the less rude

	FOOD COURT>> some extraordinary accusations flooding in from shocked
	witnesses all round the country, including the limited edition
	return of your dad's CADBURY'S AZTEC (40p in a fancy food shop in
	London) - "based on an original Cadbury's recipe" (ie basically a
	Mars bar)... following their "giant polo" treachery, NESTLE are
	re-introducing pudding corner offshoot MINI SMARTIES to the
	confectionery counter: 49p for pack with "over 101 inside" -
	actually an oddly over-engineered giant plastic smartie that twists
	open, revealing a small orifice through which the smarties queen
	can birth her tiny offspring directly into your mouth... and, most
	heinously of all, the CHAMPAGNE CRUNCHIE (35-37p) "with the flavour
	of a splash of bubbly" - ie covered with foul mini-liqueur-type
	chocolate (officially it's "Sparkling White Wine" flavour to stop
	them getting sued by wine-lovers, the French etc)... plus, have
	NESTLE considered rebranding the single-finger TWIX as "Unix"?...
	never mind the new GOLDEN GRAHAMS CD giveaway: Sainsbury's are
	bundling a disposable KODAK ADVANTIX CAMERA (UKP8.99) with a free
	"Instant Barbecue", appealing to that vast demographic who don't
	buy cameras because they don't have any outdoor meal events to
	photograph... KELLOGGS' new CEREAL AND MILK BARS (25p each) aren't
	bad at all, despite - or perhaps because - the "milk" takes the form
	of a curious white-chocolate coating, not a runny centre. Available
	in Frosties, Coco Pops and new Sugar Puff-alike "Smacks" variants
	- though, The Grocer points out, kids aren't going to pester their
	parents "Can I have a Smack please?"... and finally, some
	just-announced sci-fi survivalist treats for the coming Christmas
	Millennium: after being named "Official Supplier of Confectionery
	to the Millennium Experience", MARS are launching a giant 2kg
	CELEBRATIONS selection in a transparent, Dome-shaped bowl (price
	TBA) - the ideal target for NESTLE's missile-shaped TIME CAPSULE
	(UKP4.99) and its fun-sized Kit Kat payload... but it's left to
	PETTY, WOOD - makers, we think, of the official Barney and Action
	Man Advent Calendars - to really push the envelope with their
	CHOCOLATE RUSSIAN ROULETTE, whose "spinning gun" mounted on the box
	lid can point to one of 11 praline-filled chocs or the one
	containing "red-hot chilli" - perfect for settling those tricky "who
	lives, who dies" disputes in *your* family's Y2K bunker...

                               >> SMALL PRINT <<
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		happened last week or might happen next week.
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