A Typical TV "Anime" Scene
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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Fri, 2 Jun 100 08:33:21 -0700
Subject: A Typical TV "Anime" Scene
X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649 -=[ Fun_People ]=-
Forwarded-by: "Andrew A. Gill"
From: Ed Stasium <firstname.lastname@example.org>
I always feel so left out when threads like this come up. The closest
thing to "anime" that I've seen is stuff like "Speed Racer" and "Tranzor
Z." I guess the latter was a *bit* like "sex anime," what with those
infamous breast/missiles and all. (I wonder if the creator of Tranzor Z
Was "Voltron" dubbed into English? Thinking back on it, the characters
looked a bit anime-ish -- huge eyes, button noses, perfectly round mouths
that open to absurd widths.
I've seen a few seconds of "Dragonball Z" and "Sailor Moon," but I can't
seem to get through an entire episode of either series. From what I've
seen of those, both shows are about over-stimulated lunatics who shout
non-sequitirs at each other while performing random surrealist activities.
No scene lasts longer than 12 seconds, and the audio and video are not
*necessarily* related to one another. I imagine the scripting process
involves throwing a thesaurus into a blender and seeing what comes out.
Here's my estimation of a typical TV "anime" scene...
[A TALKING CAT IS JUGGLING KNIVES.]
CAT: Aaahhh! Where is the mind!
[CUT TO: GROUP OF SCHOOLGIRLS FLYING THROUGH SPACE]
GIRL #1: Too much vision!
GIRL #2: There is no remedy for the suitcase!
GIRL #3: I cannot exist!
[GIRL #2 TRANSFORMS INTO A WINGED DEMON]
[CUT TO: EXTREME CLOSE-UP OF SMIRKING VILLAIN]
VILLAIN: So many hats! Ha ha ha ha ha!
[WIDE SHOT REVEALS VILLAIN IS ENCASED IN GIANT GLOWING CUBE.
TALKING CAT ENTERS FRAME.]
CAT: Which is the more repellant of the two?
VILLAIN: I will never surrender!
It's at this point that I lose heart and switch to a "Real McCoys" rerun
on the Nashville Network to soothe my jangled nerves.
© 2000 Peter Langston