Fun_People Archive
3 Oct
Rumor to Dump Cheney Just Another Urban Legend....

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Tue,  3 Oct 100 20:54:07 -0700
To: Fun_People
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Subject: Rumor to Dump Cheney Just Another Urban Legend....

X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649  -=[ Fun_People ]=-
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Well, leave it a folklorist to put these urban legends to rest. Thanks to
Kathy Condon and her intrepid research this latest subterfuge about the
Republicans changing their ticket can now be laid to rest along with the
aligators in the New York subways.  Below are excerpts from a 9/26/00
datelined article by David Emery, "The Secret Plot to Dump Dick Cheney"
[from, urban legends section].
Now we can sleep through the next few debates in peace...


<<....The current contender for Faux Scoop of the Year is an email
describing a secret plan by the Republican Party to replace Bush's chosen
running mate, Dick Cheney, with a last-minute ringer....  Conspiracy
theories are naturally immune to debunking.

We can at least apply a little logic to it, beginning with the question:
How often does an email that says "Please send this to as many people as
you can" turn out to be true?  The answer, as any frequent visitor to this
site knows, is almost never.

How plausible is it that the Bush campaign would replace Cheney in the
waning hours of the campaign to "save the party?"  Opinion polls give him
an approval rating comparable to Democratic vice-presidential candidate
Joe Lieberman. He's also a phenomenal fundraiser. It's clear why Democrats
don't like Cheney, but why would the Republican Party consider this man a

More to the point, Cheney was known to have a history of heart disease when
he was nominated. It wouldn't reflect well on G.W. Bush's decision-making
abilities if Cheney ultimately bowed out due to illness. The Democrats
would make sure of it.

Besides, didn't Colin Powell reportedly turn down the nomination already?
Could George W. Bush and John McCain see eye-to-eye long enough to make it
to election day together?

There's one piece of hard evidence against the authenticity of this rumor,
inconclusive but noteworthy. It appears the scenario now circulating by
email may have originated in a comic strip published nationally on August
10, a month-and-a-half ago. (Some people have reported hearing the rumor
by word of mouth before that date, but at the very least the cartoon gave
it a jump-start.) The strip is called Tom the Dancing Bug and is written
by Ruben Bolling.

The installment in question (view it at was entitled "The Perfect
Strategy" and opens with a character opining, "Yeah, Cheney is a terrible
pick for the vice president nomination. But he's the perfect pick for what
they really have in mind." He then extols the virtues of Colin Powell,
noting the general's stated aversion to campaigning. Thus, the character
continues, the Republicans chose another nominee to do the dirty work, and
"Then, when the election's around the corner, oops! Cheney's got a health
issue! What patriotic American can step in at the last minute? It's

Foolproof?  Only in 'Toontown, I say.  Here's hoping reality doesn't prove
me wrong.>>

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